Miss Winchester
by LunaRS
Summary: Sam and Dean are back from a hunt and Sam had blocked his brother from a spell that turned him into...something else... Oneshot. Please R&R!


Dean couldn't help himself, this was just too funny.

"Y'know Sam, some weird stuff has happened to us but _this_," he chuckled, his body shaking with held in laughter.

"_This _has gotta be the funkiest."

"Shut up, Dean." Sam called angrily from the bathroom, his voice higher than usual.

Dean sat on one of the Motel beds, giggling like a child by now.

"Well at least we ganked that witch-lady."

Dean sighed, his face aching with the smile that he couldn't hold back.

"Yeah, too bad you killed her _after_ she put a spell on me." Sam grumbled, walking out of the bathroom sheepishly, sending a glare Dean's way.

Something was different about Sam, though.

_Very_ different.

Yeah, he was as tall as ever still, but there was something definitively different.

"Oh, look at that. _Very _sexy." Dean commented sarcastically.

Sam was…Female.

"This is what I get for saving your ass…" Sam mumbled in his very female voice, remembering how he'd blocked the spell from being cast on Dean. Sam set his hand on his hip and glared at his brother; it didn't help Dean hold in his laughter.

Sam had a very feminine face and his hair was the same and very suiting.

He was still lean and had curves now; he was positively sexy as a woman. Because of his newfound features and parts, he was wearing a tank top, his boxers because he refused to wear panties, very slimming jeans because his other ones were too loose; he was even, perish the thought, wearing a bra. And it was damn uncomfortable.

But he was so tall that it made him come off as more like a giant beautiful freak.

"Are you wearing a black lace bra?" Dean questioned with a childish grin.

"Dude, shut up. What was I supposed to do?" Sam grumbled, which came out sounding more like an annoyed whine.

"Well, Bobby said he'd be here in the morning. I vote we go out for a couple beers before hittin' the hay." Dean suggested, standing, grabbing his keys and wallet, and opening the motel door.

Sam slipped his wallet into his back pocket and walked up to the door, staring expectantly at Dean who was still holding the door open.

"Oh, ladies first." Dean smiled and gestured for his brother-gone-sister to leave first.

"Jerk." Sam rolled his eyes.

"Bitch." Dean retorted. Sam and Dean shared a mutual blank stare for a split second.

"Ahahahahaha!" Dean threw his head back and laughed heartily, pointing at Sam.

Sam left in a huff.

The brothers walked into the bar and found two seats at the counter.

"ID's." the bartender said, looking for all the world like he utterly hated his job.

Dean handed him his ID and Sam nervously pulled out his own and the bartender looked from _it _back to Sam, looking skeptical.

"Uh…Bad hair day." Sam made a quick excuse.

"Yeah, sure." The bartender said in a disbelieving manner.

"Two beers, please." Dean ordered, smiling at Sam.

"Cheer up, Sammy. Bobby'll fix you up tomorrow morning."

While Dean attempted to flirt with the sleazy women in the bar, Sam just sat stiffly in his seat.

The bra was very uncomfortable.

What was a girl supposed to do? What did women _usually _do in a bar?

No.

He wasn't going to flirt with men. He shuddered at the very thought of it.

He sighed and finished his beer.

'_Why'd this have to happen to me?' _ he thought to himself, leaning over the counter in an exhausted way.

"Hey there," a man's voice pulled Sam out of his thoughts.

"Can I buy you a drink?"

"Uh…no thanks…" Sam said, feeling very disgusted; his feminine voice was really getting on his nerves.

The man shrugged, unfazed, and winked.

'_I think I'm gonna be sick…' _Sam thought.

After another half-hour of flirting, Dean sat back down next to Sam, a bit of a pout on his face from his failures of the night.

He looked at Sam to catch him glancing very interestedly at a woman's rear end.

"Dude, stop. You're creeping me out." Dean said with a shudder.

Sam looked back at Dean, startled by his voice.

"Sorry." He mumbled.

After another round of beers, they walked out to the Impala. A few wasted idiots began to cat-call Sam, hooting about how they admired his rear in a very rude manner.

"Hey, give it a rest!" Dean shouted at them.

"Give 'er some respect!"

"Gee, thanks." Sam said sarcastically.

"My pleasure, Sammy." Dean smiled, ignoring his brothers/sisters glare.

They walked into the Motel and Sam ran for the bathroom. It was several minutes later that Sam walked nervously out and over to Dean.

"What's wrong Sammy?" Dean asked curiously, not sure if he wanted to know the answer to his own question.

"I-I can't…" Sam blushed and looked around exasperatedly.

"I can't get the bra off. You gotta help me." He said, his voice rising higher with embarrassment. Dean looked absolutely disgusted.

"What?"

"I don't like it any more than you do but I can't do it."

"…Fine." Dean grumbled.

Sam pulled off the tank top and turned around.

Dean, as quickly as he could, undid Sam's bra then shuddered and gagged a bit. Sam pulled the bra off and sighed with relief before scurrying off to his bed and covering himself with his blanket.

"Damn it, Sammy," Dean cursed, pinching the bridge of his nose and closing his eyes.

"We gotta fix you soon."

"You're telling _me._"

A knock at the door woke Sam.

He swung his legs over the side of the bed and stood drowsily, walking over to the door and promptly forgetting that he was only wearing boxers, no shirt, and he was a woman.

"It's Bobby." Bobby's voice called from behind the door.

Sam opened the door groggily.

Bobby looked at Sam, startled, looking down then at his face.

"Oh…my…gah…" he managed to get out.

"Put a shirt on, ya idjit!" he commanded just as Sam realized what was going on and ran off to put on some clothes.

"S-Sorry Bobby!" Sam practically squeaked, flustered.

"Calm down Sam. It's not as if I've never seen breasts before." Bobby muttered.

Once Sam was dressed and Dean was awake, the three of them conducted a ritual to change Sam's gender back to normal.

It worked almost instantly and Sam sighed with relief.

He was Male again, finally.

"Okay, I'll be heading back now." Bobby said.

"Just don't let anything like this happen again, ya idjits."

"Thanks, Bobby." Sam said, his voice low once again.

Once Bobby left, Sam looked at Dean sternly.

"We will never, ever, speak of this." He said.

Dean smiled and picked up the now packed duffle bag and opened the door.

"Ladies first." Dean smiled.


End file.
